Week 16 is in the books, but none of the games are over yet! Let’s start with the first half of the Mopey Bowl.
Revenants – 258.40 [MVP: QBs Matt Ryan and Drew Brees – 110.4]
Stompers – 233.22 [MVP: QBs Aaron Rodgers and Tony Romo – 115.42]
Halftime Spread – 25.18 points
In a game of pure pride, the Revenants continue to strive to prove that, had they just made it into the playoffs, the Championship would be theirs. This marks the second week in a row that the Revenants’ total points have been 5-0, with the Stompers at 4-1 both weeks. In fact, the NFL’s Top 4 QB’s on the week were starting in THIS MATCHUP! That’s a first for LOS, so that’s exciting. As such, the Stompers were able to take QB by 5.02(Brees edged Romo in their shootout by .10, while Rodgers’ 55-7 rout of the Titans beat Ryan’s Lions’ win by 5.12). Heh. Ryan’s Lions. Anyway. The Stompers also took WR by 21.70 (thanks to a HUGE 50.40-point game by Dez Bryant) and Kicker by 2. The Revenants took RB by 28.70(I don’t know what Frank Gore and CJ2K intended to do Sunday, but it wasn’t “Play Football.”) They also took Flex by 3.2 and Defense by 22. The lead at halftime is largely due to the Bears Defense, but the Stompers only have a 25.18-point deficit to overcome by the end of Week 17, and the Revenants look to maintain without stars Matt Ryan and Roddy White, who have already clinched a 1st-round Bye and will likely sit the week out. MVP’s: All 4 QBs deserve a mention for being over 50 fantasy points each, and returning to their normal selves.
Horsemen – 200.52 [MVP: Ravens RB Ray Rice – 41.80]
Great Whites – 167.84 [MVP: Jets RB Shonn Greene – 29]
Spread – 32.68
With the biggest deficit to overcome after halftime in these last two games, the Great Whites head into our final week with some tough decisions at their lineup. Eli and Cruz have become inconsistent, and Julio Jones may not play. The Great Whites are thin at WR, so forcing them into a WR lineup doesn’t help. Meanwhile, Trent Richardson also looks unlikely to play, and forcing the Horsemen into an RB lineup has lost them more than one game in the past. Enough about the future. The Horsemen took QB by 7.08 thanks to another meltdown by Eli. RG3 beat Bradford by a mere .06, so the rest of it is Eli’s deficit to Luck. This time, Eli at least had some garbage time points and brought it up by about 10 points in the fourth quarter(to 18.80), but his fantasy numbers aren’t helping the likes of Hakeem Nicks and Victor Cruz. Eli is now the 18th-ranked QB of the NFL, and the Great Whites’ QB’s are now the bottom three in terms of the 18 QB’s owned in the LOS(if you combine all three of them, they have a total of 5 points more than Brees and Brady combined on the season). The Horsemen also took RB by 21.30, where Ray Rice crushed Doug Martin by a full 13.90 points, and Arian Foster left the game in the third quarter with an irregular heartbeat(let’s just hope the guy’s okay before worrying about any fantasy implications). The Horsemen also took WR by 13.60(thanks to Cruz’s 5.10 points). The Great Whites took the rest, leading Flex by 1.30, and Kicker and Defense by 4 each. Ray Rice was the only Horsemen player to break the 32.68-point spread, so the Horsemen could’ve led at halftime minus any one player not named Ray Rice. The Great Whites have a big deficit to overcome in our final week to vie for third place and lose that draft spot to the Horsemen(perhaps next year this game should be playing to win a BETTER draft pick? Just to make it more interesting… Not this year, obviously, as we’re already at halftime, but something to consider.). MVP: Ravens RB Ray Rice had enough points this week to (I did the &%*#ing math) have won a spot into the Championship had he done it LAST WEEK against the Beatleteers. But it wouldn’t have been enough to overcome the Spectres this week, so I guess it doesn’t really matter. Just a tinge of bitterness coming out. After all, your recap IS written by a Coach in this league(what!?).
Spectres – 231.18 [MVP: Chiefs’ RB Jamaal Charles – 44.50]
Beatleteers – 205.28 [MVP: Seahawks’ RB Marshawn Lynch – 42.00]
Spread – 25.9
The Spectres had a lot of disappointing games by their players this week, particularly in the Quarterback and Adrian Peterson categories, but no fear: Danny Amendola saved their week by posting -.5 points! That’s right, our first starting player to ever receive less than zero points, making him the worst WR in the NFL for the week. Even worse than the points I earned sitting on my couch watching games from home. The Beatleteers should’ve played Titus Young, who’s on IR. But alas, they did not. Tom Brady put up a lower fantasy point total than the likes of Russell Wilson, Nick Foles, Chad Henne, and Colin Kaepernick, and was only able to edge Ryan Tannehill by .08 points. It was bad. Cam Newton put up 36.80, but even that seemed disappointing when six NFL QB’s broke 45 for the week. Adrian Peterson even had five free agents perform better than him on the week (with his 22.50). Anyway, enough ribbing on the Spectres, they’re just glad they don’t have DeMarco Murray, Andre Johnson, Danny Amendola, or the 49ers Defense. My point is, this is an ugly game carried by a few superstars. Obviously, the Beatleteers took QB by 20.50(Stafford had a huge garbage-time game with 46.56). Aside from Calvin Johnson outperforming Wes Welker by 5.10(congratulations on the record, by the way!), the Spectres led every other category. They took RB by 9.40(which was actually mostly Peterson over Murray(by 6.90), since Lynch made it respectable against Charles’ 44.50(with 42.00)), WR by 3.50(Andre Johnson’s 16.70 were abysmal and Calvin just couldn’t carry him), Flex by 23(but, as I said, the Spectres could’ve won Flex by playing me), Kicker by 3.50, and Defense by 7(Russell Wilson picked the 49ers apart). So, the first half of this game sees a 25.9-point lead for the Spectres, but anything could happen. The Beatleteers have been at least 25.9 points better than the Spectres exactly 4 times this regular season(which of course means the Spectres prevented that 10 times), so don’t count them out yet! We’ve still got another week, and every team(except the Falcons) seems to be intent on playing their starters in the final week, so it should stay interesting! MVP: Jamaal Charles’ 44.50 points obviously aren’t his highest game of the season, but it does mark the first time the Chiefs’ RB has broken 40 since that huge game, and that game was in Week 3! 226 rushing yards and a TD were enough to make people forget the fumble, and make him the best fantasy RB of the week.
So that’s the halftime report. The Spectres, Horsemen, and Revenants look to be the winners going into Week 17, but none of them have enough of a lead to feel comfortable just yet, so December 30th is still taking place at the Great Whites’ and Stompers’ house to finish up the season, so bring yourself, your new team gear, and the treat of your choice, and let’s watch some football!
League of Shadows
PS Merry Christmas everybody! If you’re traveling, stay safe, and if you’re not, ask your loved ones to do the same.